Are You Suffering From 'TARD'?
Trump Acceptance Resistance Disorder (TARD) is a pattern of pathologically dissociative and psychotic behavior, first observed in the late hours of November 8th 2016, and increasing in severity with passing time. Sufferers of TARD often exhibit pronounced cognitive dissonance, sudden bouts of rage, uncontrollable crying, suicidal ideation, and extreme sadness. Individual sufferers often display signs of paranoia and delusion; in acute cases psychotic episodes have been observed.
TARD is different from being upset about the results of the 2016 presidential election; People with TARD are unwilling or unable to accept reality, despite irrefutable evidence.
According to the DSM-V, individuals with TARD exhibit most or all of the following symptoms:
- Telling others they are moving to Canada
- Fixated on fantasies about the Electoral College
- Protesting an election no credible source contests the outcome of
- Exclamations that “Someone” should do “Something”
- Acute change in demeanor from pompous and arrogant to fearful and combative
- Claim that anyone who disagrees with them is some combination of Racist, Sexist, Bigoted, Homophobic, and actually some sort of Hitler persona
TARD was directly caused by the election of Donald Trump as President of the United States of America. For many, both in America and worldwide, this was a shocking and unexpected outcome; their preferred news sources telling them it was impossible and having failed to inform them that the alternative candidate was in such ill health she got chucked into the back of a van like a kidnap victim.
Diagnosis of TARD is straightforward. Ask the patient if Donald Trump is the President-elect of the United States of America. Some patients will become agitated, and may attempt to deflect. It’s critical you press them on the issue, even if they start babbling about ‘muh triggers’. A sufferer of TARD will begin to ramble incoherently, often displaying three or more of the symptoms within a short period of time.
The only known effective treatment is exposure therapy. The patient must be repeatedly exposed to reality.